Monday, July 1, 2013

Hello July and HOT weather!!!

I just read Pattie's post and she inspired me to blog what I have been thinking lately. Thinking is always dangerous for me, but I'd like to share a bit.

I have been back at Zumba for more than a month, have really watched my S/C values, have been pretty perfect on the sugar, carbs not so much.... and I am still at the same weight I was a month ago:( A month ago I was eating as many cookies as I could get in my body, not working out at all, eating whatever and whenever I wanted.....I expected instant results, I am getting little results. I think I had shared that one of my rolls was gone, and it is, but I still have more. I feel like the extra weight hampers my Zumba abilities, it hampers how I feel about myself, it hampers my "feeling good".

The "mature" part of my brain tells me that I am 56 years old. What do I expect? Am I going to let a 10 lb weight gain over the course of a year make me crazy? Unhappy? Unlovable? Unattractive? I weight 143 lbs for gosh sakes....I weighed 164.5 when I started this journey??? I get so down on myself and then I go places and I see women heavier than myself really "owning" how they look. Do they obsess when no one is looking? I have VERY dimply legs and my upper arms are getting bad too. You can't firm skin. FACT. I have very thin skin, which means I have very few wrinkles on my face, but it means my fat shows through. UGH!!!!!

I am really struggling with getting fiber in. When I actually use myfitnesspal, I am shocked by how little I get. I do take magnesium and that helps a lot, but I know real fiber would be good for me too. Really the only healthy thing I eat is my spinach when I can stand it, and fruit. UGH again!!!

This week is a crazy week, so I am going to just keep, keeping on. Next week I am thinking of starting a mostly meat, veggies, eggs, and fruit plan. I truly do not want what I weigh to be my degree of happiness. I have come so far with getting rid of my antidepressant, cutting my blood pressure pills in 1/2. I can't let 10 lbs defeat me. I refuse!

Oh, and it appears that my DIL pregnancy was chemical again:( She is so unbelievable sad that I don't even know what to say.

Have a wonderful 4th! Count your Blessings!!!

5 comments:

  1. So sorry about your daughter-in-law. Such a sad sitution. Don't worry about those 10lbs. I haven't even reached my goal, but I know that I am healthier now and I just keep going. Giving up the bread isn't as hard as it seems. I made some of the different muffins and breads using the other flours. I eat all the sandwiches like burgers and such without the roll. Next I'm going to try and give up potatoes as I find I am substituting them and corn for the carbs I'm missing in bread. Just trying different strategies to keep my from slipping up so much. You know it's always going to be a lifelong battle, so I guess we'd better get used to it!!XO!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Very sorry about DIL. Sometimes I feel like you, not about my weight - cause I think its good for my height, but about the skin thing. I can SO relate!!
    When the skin gets so stretched out from being fat before - it will never bounce back - EVER!! No bikini for me EVER.
    To be honest at my age - who wants to wear one anyway. I except me the way I am dimply thighs and all.
    Like I always say just put your clothes back on and look in the mirror again. LOL
    Have a great 4th :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sorry to hear about the chemical pregnancy. ;( I know how it feels to be wishing for quicker results, but at this size we have to work hard for those last 10 pounds. whew!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am sorry to hear about your DIL, that is tough. I have been there too.

    You how far you have come, you look amazing. Keep it up and don't fret about your dimples & your arms. You are rocking the Zumba classes !!!

    I too am struggling with the fiber thing, I am adding in more and more each day.

    Happy 4th !

    ReplyDelete