More insane, but back to Zumba:)

I seriously can't believe how BAD I have been. For 2+ years I dabbled now and again, but the last 2+ weeks have been an all out FOOD FEST!!! CARBS, COOKIES, CHIPS!!! Are you kidding me??? The real problem started about 2 weeks ago when hubby and I went up to Trader Joe's to get the little pecan cookie that I had gotten there before. 4 cookies were like 4/2. I used to crush a couple up in my fruit and cool whip. Anyway....my husband LOVES chocolate chip cookies and I had seen a web post about the top 10 chocolate chip cookies. 3 of them came from Trader Joe's, so we decided to get them for him. Well they no longer carry my cookies, but they did have his. The number one cookie was crunchy and he does not like crunchy cookies. I tried one, then I had another, then I had more.....and within 3 days, I had eaten about 12 pretty large cookies. That started my binge and I mean binge. Last night I had pizza hut pan pizza, bread sticks and then cinnamon sticks with icing. OMG!!! CRAZY!!!! And in there somewhere.....my husband bought me a bag of Lay's potato chips:( 

So...now I weighed in at 143.1 this morning. My lowest weight was 132.9, but I stayed pretty steady around 135. I am lucky it is not way more....and it could be by the time I get back on track. We are going to a graduation party out of town tomorrow, and my family loves their food at parties!

HAPPY:) 

I did go back to Zumba on Wednesday and plan to go tomorrow. I felt really good to see my friends again. I just love it! I should go way more, but I will figure it out again.

Tis a slippery slope my friends....BEWARE!!!

This is a picture of my daughter that NEVER smiles...she is working at a Spa and the owners comped a makeover for her. Remember her scalp had been burned really bad so they had to be careful. The smile on her face shows how happy she is, which makes me really happy:)

I will return to BFC and I will be successful again....I just don't know when yet! I know that it works, and I know the foods that helped make me successful the first go round. 

Pray for me;) 

On the home front, I am loving having the hubby here. He is just selling away on his ebay. Keeps him busy and fills his pockets. We went to Iron Man on Tuesday...oh and I ate BBQ ribs, brisket, potato casserole, yeast roll  and an ice cream cone??? WTH? Anyway, I loved Iron Man, but I found it stressful and that took away some of the entertainment value. Crazy huh? 

I just thought I would check in and tell you WHAT NOT TO DO!!!

Blessings and happy scales....

Still insane, and now sad:(

Last Friday I had wonderful news from my daughter in law. She rejected my offer of coffee when she dropped my grandson off and that set the preggers bells off in my head. Sure enough she had taken a pregnancy test and it was positive. Fast forward to Saturday and she started to spot and to today when the ultrasound showed no baby:( I am so sad for her, she was so EXCITED and she has wanted another child for 5 years. My grandson turns 6 next month. They are very solid in their Faith and His timing, but it is so sad to me. We had Cy's baseball game tonight so it was good to see them all and give them a hug and to tell them I love them. I swear these new pregnancy tests that tell them they are pregnant in like 4 days are hard. I think in the old days it took longer to find out and sometimes things just worked themselves out before heart break. I know my daughter Kayce really struggled with the same thing and now she has a Konner and he is a healthy 7 month old. I pray the same happens for Bree and Grant. 

Cy Noah

On another topic, I watched Jorge on Dr.Oz today. I kind of get where he is coming from with the whole sugar/carb thing. He is claiming that you can lose 9 lbs a week by following his new plan. If you only need to lose around 10 lbs, you can lose about 4 lbs a week. Hmmmm.....would be nice. 

I am still totally out of control and not making much of an effort to be good. I will, that's why I need to blog, so I can get my head straight. 

INSANITY!!! 

Thanks for listening:) 

May God Bless and heal all of  the people in Oklahoma, I am so sad for them too. So, so sad:( 

The blur on the left is my first hummingbird! I got the feeder last year and never saw it used until 2 days ago! They are fast!!!

WAKE UP!!! HELLO:)

My pants my hubby hates:)

Hello my friends!!! Just a quick note to check in and say that I am a GAINER!!! I think I am up to about 142. That is about 10 lbs over my lowest weight and 7 lbs over my desired weight of 135. YIKES!!! We went on our shopping/eating excursion and I definitely enjoyed myself. I ate sooooo much sugar, kind of hoping it may make me sick? Well it didn't make me sick (sugar barf sick), but I have a sore throat and a cough again. Really? 

INSANITY!!!

 I don't know what in the heck is in my head, but it isn't BFC. 

I went to lunch with a friend today and told her that I was on a binge until next Monday, I even drank diet coke! What!!! However, for dinner the last 2 nights I have had a BIG spinach salad with some ranch and my chili cheese fritos crushed up. 2 nights of something healthy isn't bad. That's as healthy as it gets at K's house and that is one of the problems!!! My husband, because I am so bitchy about my "girth", asks me if I am eating too many carbs? Really? That just makes me more hungry! He hates my linen pants, but I love them because they are so comfortable. My jeans are TIGHT:( 

I am going to share the pic from Mother's day. You can really tell in this picture that I have gained. Most of the pics my husband took I cropped from the shoulder up. UGH:( 

If I have to start cropping all my pictures, I am not a happy camper. I'll blame it on the cream colored top, I wonder why I wear black so much??? 

I am getting my hair cut tomorrow and I am going to have her layer it again. I have been growing it out, but I think the longer layers just make me look old. I also haven't had it highlighted/colored since March 6th so it is ready to get beautified. I have told myself for 3 years that I am going to quit going to my hair gal and here I go again. Insanity runs in my blood! 

My husband is really enjoying being home and selling his wares on ebay. He is so easy to have around that it just feels good, and I love knowing he is safe with me. I do know he has some resumes out there, but I don't know how hard he is trying to find a job. I asked him yesterday if he had a cool million stashed somewhere! 

My car is actually getting used again so that is nice. Have I mentioned that it is a 2008 with 21,000 miles? And my husbands car is  2003 with 5000 miles? There's that damn insanity again!!! No more company car so I guess maybe they will both get used! 

Blessings and happy scales....Woot for INSANITY!!!

Happy Mother's Day:)

Hello friends:) I feel blessed to have each and every one of you that read this blog. I feel like in the past I have been more honest on here, that in "real" life. Weird. I do know that when I look back at posts from previous times, it does bring a smile to my face to see what I was doing or thinking. So this blog is for me, to remember little things that at the moment I was writing, were important! If it is read, that's great...if it is not, then I will treasure the memories!

I miss these 2 more than I can say:( 

So with that said, I just went to a memorial service for one of my Dear friends Mom. They had an amazing service for her at our local Country Club. It was "ritzy", just like her, but also showed how simple her heart was(She drove a Lexus and had tons of pairs of Birkenstocks). I used to travel with their family, and spent tons of time at their lake place when we were younger. I also was blessed to have sold her several Thomas Kinkade paintings that her children/grandchildren now cherish. What a "wonderful life" she has led. She was 80 years young:) The things her 3 kids said about her, I can only pray that my children "think" about me. She will be missed every single day.

I just finished my 10th day of antibiotics and I made it for 2 nights without cough syrup. Progress!!! I swear the cough syrup was liquid sugar! It was necessary, but gross. I have not been thinking one single, tiny bit about my weight, food, what I should or shouldn't eat. I have been in a free for all with the knowledge implanted in my brain about what I should do. I think for the most part, I make good decisions. I was just ready to go back to Zumba next Wednesday and the gym is closed for 2 weeks! Looks like I have a vacation until the first part of June. Dang:)

Monday hubby and I are going to Missoula MT for shopping therapy. I am excited to get away and eat at my favorite places. It will be a nice quick trip, but I am ready to blow this joint and quit being sick!

On a shocking front, we have one piece of our granite installed. I asked 100 different ways when to expect the rest, and was never given a clear answer. The one piece does look pretty amazing!

finally....

My oldest son has a full day planned tomorrow, none of which includes me, and my twins are taking me to lunch. My own mom is going to the casino. I love the dysfunction of our family:) Not! At least I know my husband loves me and will make sure I always feel good. 

Happy Mother's Day and Blessings to all:)

Too much sugar lowers our immunities! Insanity!!!

So I am either allergic to my daughter, or she is a bad influence! Or I am just a glutton for punishment! Either way, whenever we get together I eat too much sugar and then I get sick. I got home Monday and I knew I was feeling rough, but I had no idea that I would cough myself 1/2 to death all night. I decided I had too much to do to be sick so I went to the Dr. and had a sinus infection and pink eye. Lovely pink eye! I remember telling my seat mate on the plane not to worry that I coughed a little and my eyes were pink, my daughter assured me it was just allergies. In case you don't know this: Allergies cause your eyes to be runny, pink eye causes them to be goopy. I didn't know that since I have never had allergies in my life and I guess I still don't. So what would the good news be out of my sickies? I was 140.9 this AM and I have pretty much cleaned out my system. I slept last night and hopefully tomorrow I will wake up and be totally healthy again. 10 days of anti biotics will hopefully knock out the nasties. My poor husband gets a sick wife back after being away for 2 weeks:( I will never go for 2 weeks again, not only did I eat way too much, I spent sooooo much money on stupid things, like food! UGH!!!

At the Hilton in Atlanta. This family is LOUD in a hotel. I was mortified! 

I just wanted to check in, I am too tired still to really think much! Pattie had asked our lifestyle commandments for food. Here's mine:

1. Sugar is toxic and I will avoid it. I will have a bite or 2 every once in awhile, but then I will get sick again....go figure!

2. I will always watch my carbs and try and eat what is best for me, but I won't give up my white bread. It isn't a realistic lifestyle choice for me. 

3. I rarely drink diet soda, rarely!!! I love ice tea with Stevia in the raw

4. Calories do matter in my life. I can't eat too many day after day without gaining weight. I have said it many times, I do not gain weight by eating potatoes, I gain weight because I ate too many potatoes. 

5. I eat potatoes! 

That's all I can think of right now. I guess my top 2 would be the same BFC I have been practicing for a little over 2 years. 15/6. 

Remember to tell the ones that you love that you love them. My Dear friend lost her Mom unexpectedly yesterday. I spent so much time with them when I was younger. It makes me very sad:( 

Blessings and happy scales....